Very Specific Instructions For Dealing With Coronavirus Anxiety

There are real, concrete things you can do to manage your anxiety. It’s not all about “thinking positive” or anything as simplistic as that. Anxiety is a physiological response to a stimulus. Since the stimulus we have right now is fear of the plague, we as a world are being presented with anxiety from which […]

What I Do In Therapy

I do particularly well with lists of capital-T-Truths. Truth is always at the heart of healing, and finding it is the ultimate goal of therapy. In a recent session, I was dealing with the problematic and painful cognition “I am a bad person/I am broken”. This was a huge problem for me for several years, […]

How (And Why) To Choose A Therapist

Therapy offers you the ability to change your thoughts and feelings. Any problem you have can be addressed with a therapist. And though not all problems can be solved through therapy, many emotional and cognitive problems related to life issues can be dramatically improved, whether you’re mentally ill or not. Over time, you build a […]

Congratulations! You’re a Horrible Person.

Am I a bad person? If I am, how can I be better? I’ll do whatever it takes to be better, please just tell me how. My introduction to borderline personality disorder was through my best friend and my mother, both of whom I love very much. They both have mothers who have been diagnosed […]

Life After Husband

All I Have To Do Is Feel; Day Two of the Aftermath   He’s gone. He was my biggest and most important metric for success, meaning that without him, I’m unmoored. I’m writing lists of values and priorities and goals now that my life is wide open, which is terrifying, exciting, and promising. But “be […]

Why We Should Be Scared

I am so confused. When I started, I thought I was pissed, but I’m not. I’m bewildered. How did this happen? How did we poison so many young white men? School shooters, Incels, groypers, MGTOW, pick-up artists, MRAs. How much of the electorate do they have? And their determination scares the fuck out of me. […]

A Very BPD Problem

Once upon a time, my poor boundaries led me to unceremoniously, unkindly dump a faithful friend. My mother clearly identified it recently as me devaluing this woman who I loved. Idolatry and devaluation are opposite ends of an interpersonal problem that many people with borderline personality disorder have. Someone who you once loved deeply becomes […]

Everyone Does Not Feel That Way

Let’s play pretend. Imagine you’re vacuuming your carpet. The room is big, the carpet’s a mess, and your vacuum cleaner is loud. Twenty minutes later, you’re finished, and when you turn off the vacuum, your ears start ringing. The ringing is so loud that you can barely hear your loud music playing. You call me […]